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Is there a good way to collect on a debt from a relative who hasn't paid up? --R., Chico, Calif.

With kindness and respect in a conversation or letter, try to find a workable solution. Maybe you can offer your relative a longer time to repay or take goods or services in lieu of cash. --Amanda, Beaverton, Ore.

You can resort to legal remedies, but if you'll face this person at family functions for the next 20 years, that may not be the route you want to travel. --K.S., West Chester, Pa.

Equate what your relationship is worth to a dollar amount. If the relationship is more valuable than the amount borrowed, consider the money a gift and the tuition for a lesson learned. --Karen, Michigan

What's your advice to this reader? Post your comment below.