Q: I just received a great job offer. Unfortunately the title is not what I agreed to. What do I do now?
I formally accepted it on Friday, but over the weekend I realized that the title in the offer letter isn’t the same as the title I interviewed for. The offer letter states “program coordinator” and I interviewed for a “program manager” position.
I’ve emailed the recruiter on Monday morning and asked if it was an intentional change or an oversight and whether the title could be changed back to “program manager”…but did I really mess up here? I feel like it was a bit of a bait-and-switch, and I really should be at the “program manager” level rather than “coordinator.” Is there anything I should/can do beyond emailing the recruiter?
A: That’s the right first step — and I’d be matter-of-fact about it, like, “I just noticed that the offer letter has a different job title than the one I applied for and we’ve been discussing (it says program coordinator rather than program manager). I’m assuming it’s just a mistake, but can you confirm that the job is indeed the program manager job that was advertised?” If it turns out that it’s deliberate, (a) that’s really crappy of them to just slip that into the offer letter without explaining it to you, and (b) at that point you can try to negotiate the title and role, and/or get a better understanding of the differences in the roles, and/or retract your acceptance since it’s the wrong position.
But start by assuming it was an oversight and see what happens.
Q: How can I ask my manager to respect my personal space?
I started a new job as a trainee a few weeks ago. The room I’m in is me, two managers, and one of the partners in the firm. This is great because at least one person is always available for questions, and I work closely with all three of them.
My problem is, one of the managers has no concept of personal space. She’s not reaching out and touching me, and it’s not done in a skeevy way at all – she just seems to want to be in the exact space I’m in when she’s talking to me. About 2-3 times a day, I’m sitting in my desk chair, and she’s standing over me with maybe an inch between her arm and my head, her leg brushing my seat, and so on.
It makes me extremely uncomfortable. I’ve tried scooching away from her, but she just moves closer again. I’ve said “I can’t actually see what you’re talking about, could you move over” multiple times, but it doesn’t sink in. I don’t want to say “Sorry but I’m weird about this,” because I don’t think it’s a weird request and I don’t want to pretend it is.
A: I think a lot of people would hate this, so I agree it’s not a weird request — although unfortunately it may take her aback because most people wimp out of saying anything in these situations, so she may never have heard it before. Nevertheless, if you want it to stop, you’re going to have to say something. I’d say it this way: “I have a big personal space bubble — sorry! Can I move you over here?” I hear you on not wanting to pretend that it’s weird or anything that you should have to apologize for, but that kind of framing lets her save face and will probably minimize the awkwardness.
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Alternately, you could try just moving back. when she’s standing over you, move your chair or even get up if you need to. But it doesn’t sound like she’s taking hints, so you probably do need to be more direct.
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